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NOT THE MAN​/​/​NOT THE PLACE

by Hesher Cats

/
1.
Me. The god. 07:40
I’m busy cramming words Into places they were never supposed to go I’m clawing faces and stomping cases as I push the rest below Me. The god. The one with the perfect plan that I came up with on my own (Yes that’s) Me. The god. I’ll leave some scraps once I’ve dined on the pearl of your bones Cause when you’re down, and on the run There’s no one to leave behind We’re all bleeding out together Having fun, counting heat Lusting with sleepless eyes Who said that we would last forever? I found faith in the one I love, I didn’t need to look very far to find Me. The god. The one with the perfect plan that I came up with on my own (Yes that’s) Me. The god. I’ll leave some scraps once I’ve dined on the pearl of your bones Cause when you’re down, and on the run There’s no one to leave behind We’re all bleeding out together Having fun, counting heat Lusting with sleepless eyes Who said that we would last forever?
2.
Hear me, O child, and get in line Prostrate before the dollar sign We’ll starve the beast of hope in our hearts To serve the love of our divine I pledge my life at the altar of convenience There is no price, no debt, too high to pay So feast your mind on my continental genius Cause I was born to live this way This emblem has a warm embrace Like nature nurtures swine We’re getting dizzier off every drop And we’re not getting off this thing alive So hear this, O child, and turn back around Everyone will fall flat for the killing cloud We’ll cheer for the meek when they’re safe in a grave And make love to the time we saved I pledge my life at the altar of convenience There is no price, no debt, too high to pay So feast your mind on my continental genius Cause I was born to live this way I’d give up anything if you give me a way out I’d give up anything if you give me a way out I’m looking for the shine that used to light this place up, couldn’t find it That’s okay, I can find a good replacement Somewhere soft to lay my head down Something warm to drown the sorrows Something busy trading me in One perfect day at a time One perfect day at a time I pledge my life at the altar of convenience There is no price, no debt, too high to pay So feast your mind on my continental genius Cause I was born to live this way
3.
Those Girls 05:55
Long day I’m feeling sick Time to find those girls Time to find those girls I’m learning how To be in love Even when my dreams come true And they’re not as pretty as I thought they’d be I’m learning how to be in love Even when my dreams come true I’m learning how to be in love Even when my dreams come true Those girls Those girls don’t make me change They love me the way I am No need for talking Just silence. Just dirty silence. My eyes are sallow, peering empty And my ears don’t hear a word you say This week is finally over Time to make it with those girls This week is finally over Time to make it With Those Girls.
4.
Angel 04:22
I poured my sweat into a bucket Traded for a shiny automobile Now all my friends can drown in envy As I slump into the wheel Dance before me, angel Dance your cares away Sing me love songs angel Cause I am here to stay And the wife is back home sleeping While my shiny, fancy car Is bathing in the dim, red light Of the dirty flashing star (let’s say “I love you”) Dance before me, angel Dance your cares away Sing me love songs angel Cause I am here to stay Found myself an angel And I love the way she sings Fixed my eyes on angel And clipped her perfect wings This cavern has no bottom Eternal depth is cold The girl at home is lovely But she can’t compare to gold So dance before me, angel Dance your cares away Sing me love songs, angel Cause I am here to stay
5.
Clutter 03:20
I’m sorry, I can’t see the truth Past all the bliss that’s cluttering the room (That’s why we love how we do) I’m sorry, I can’t taste your kiss The way that lovers often do (Maybe I’m better without you) Another sweltering affair We tread where hearts refuse to dare And now our eyes are glazing over My shaking hands are turning pale The light casts pools of patience in your eyes Now tell me why I’ll be left behind I’m sorry, I can see the truth The bliss got sucked right out the room. I’ll start over without you. Another sweltering affair We tread where hearts refuse to dare And now our eyes are glazing over
6.
I never had a deal like this before All the dreams and nothing more What’s waiting for me, I may never get to know But I never had a deal like this before All the dreams and nothing more What’s waiting for me, I may never get to know But I never had a deal like this before All the dreams and nothing more What’s waiting for me, I may never get to know But I never had a deal like this before All the dreams and nothing more What’s waiting for me, I may never get to know Feel the sun eclipse your every move The taste of pleasure tearing into you Spend your time learning all the names Of every life that’s never coming true I used to hear a shaking in the floor I’d wake up to scratching at the door But the flavor burned the fear away It’s all the dreams And nothing more. There is always a better rain waiting Beyond this present stormcloud And there’s always a bitter pain waiting Just beyond this present joy Cause there’s always greener pastures growing Beyond this present landmine And there’s always darker waters, drowning Beneath this present sunshine Feel the sun eclipse your every move The taste of pleasure tearing into you Spend your time learning all the names Of every life that’s never coming true I used to hear a shaking in the floor I’d wake up to scratching at the door But the flavor burned the fear away It’s all the dreams And nothing more.
7.
My rose petal decorum The tone that is covering the lump in my throat Swallow it down My rose petal decorum The tone that is covering the lump in my throat I’ll swallow it down To savor the mystery This unexplored horizon Ten thousand lifetimes in the arms of a dream So, dear, light the candles Place your world at my feet This love is never demanding And my kiss will always be sweet Dear, light the candles Place your world at my feet This love is never demanding And my kiss will always be sweet The paint chips away at the corners Where the past ran off to hide Because the beauty of the present Tears the linen up inside This love is faithful This love is steadfast This love is This love is Is love Is Love This love is a feeling I caught the other day This love is a fever A pill that slipped away This love is the reason For fingers intertwined This love is the welling eyes Of the one I left behind This love is the laughter A radiant, splitting sun This love is the wind in my sails As I blow out the candles, every last one Every Last One
8.
He held my hand I held my breath He held my heart And taught me (lovedeathlifepoison) He wasn’t the man I invited The eager and the pious Scoffing from the depths of my illusion He wasn’t the man I invited Now everything’s gone quiet My name the last black speck upon his memory He wasn’t the man I invited Now everything’s gone quiet I tremble as the dreams fall down around me He wasn’t the man I invited Now everything’s gone quiet Who will weep to find that I’ve gone missing?
9.
This is not the place I remember Everything is brighter And peace has settled Over me
10.
Am I pure enough? Am I clean enough To fight my way out of this one whole? Am I strong enough? Am I mean enough To climb my way out of this hole? Now darling, listen here Cause this broken voice will fail you I don’t want to run anymore There must be something here That won’t damage or forsake you I want to believe that it’s near God make my bones forget the world’s toll (I’m not pure enough I’m not clean enough On my own I’ll never make it out whole) Lead me with a voice that will save this soul (I’m not strong enough I’m not mean enough On my own I’ll never make it out whole) I don’t want to hide anymore I’ll stop, and I’ll stand, and cry out from the land, “You give sight to the blind, so burn out this night, Let my sinful spirit die!”

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released September 11, 2020

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Hesher Cats Seattle, Washington

Hesher Cats is the body through which multi-instrumentalist Robert Clarke formulates his music. He composes, records, and produces all his own material, and when the opportunity presents itself, he plays live with other, like-minded musicians.

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