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Future Barbarians

by Hesher Cats

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1.
Everyone knew, yet there I was with my head in the clouds Everyone knew, but I didn’t want to bring you down But now I wish that I had seen it And now I wish that I’d believed it And there’s nowhere I can go to hide from you Nothing bites at my heels the way you do Inescapable as scraping the ground (It’s a taste of the past that won’t go away) Stealing time like nothing I’ve found (It’s a taste of the past that won’t go away) (Ghosts of the past become barbarians Of the future)
2.
I never knew just how ugly I was til my other half walked away Light a candle for all the beauty I had Before I lost my place (Oooooh) I hear my footsteps in the hall I guess I’m ugly after all (Ooooooh) Maybe I’ll sleep again someday Or maybe I won’t I didn’t know just how silent I was Until you kicked me in the teeth Write me a song for the man I was Before I lost my beat I used to dance like the world was gone But then I lost my feet I wouldn’t blame you if you put me down Just please, make it sweet (Oooooh) I hear your voice on every call Maybe I’m lonely, after all (Ooooooh) Maybe I’ll sleep again someday When your footsteps go away So here I am, a swerving mess Both of my arms pressed to the gas And I’m drawing charcoal on the road Can’t see the stop sign for the tears Can’t see the heartache past my fears So I guess it’s time to go If I can’t have my other half Can I at least take back the years Can’t take the timing anymore I guess I’m still breathing, so I’ll be right here waiting With the pictures and the notes I held onto with a hope ‘cause I was thinking Maybe you’d change your mind? Maybe you’d change your mind? Maybe you’d change your mind? (I hear your voice in every call, maybe I’m lonely after all) Maybe you’d change your mind? (And maybe I’ll sleep again someday when your footsteps go away) Maybe you’d change your mind
3.
And now I’m hearing all my words coming from Someone else’s mouth Cause life just moves too quickly to keep up and Get word out So settle for the second best The first worst of the three Cause everyone adores that Mister Punctuality Timing is everything, it’s everything, it’s… Timing is everything, it’s everything, it’s… Timing is everything, it’s everything, it’s… (Timing is everything) So now I’ll earn my stripes as Mister Punctuality If my words don’t do your mind in I’ll be living there rent free The best part of your weekend is the time you spend with me Jump onto my highway and let that time just be And you could keep on running, but the feeling makes you sick And sprinting towards the deadline won’t Keep the hunger fixed Now I can feed you stories To clarify what makes you tick Buy into my program And you’ll be worse than nothing quick Timing is everything, it’s everything, it’s… Timing is everything, it’s everything, it’s… Timing is everything, it’s everything, it’s… Timing is everything Timing is everything, it’s everything, it’s… Timing is everything, it’s everything, it’s… Timing is everything, it’s everything, it’s… Timing is everything This life is who you know and where you are and when This life is where you know and who you are and why The secret’s why you are and how you know And then Timing is everything This life is who you know and where you are and when This life is where you know and who you are and why The secret’s why you are and how you know And then Timing is everything
4.
I keep on running into walls I keep on falling off the shelf I don’t need you to pull the sutures I can rip them out myself If you remember where I am Don’t hesitate to fill me in And if you see me with the wind in my sails Feel free to forget again Chasing down the best of days (I’m turning round the corner) A marathon on broken legs (I’m turning round the corner, I’m turning…around) They can’t see me past my brand new suit (Sign my cast, make it fast, cause I think it’s time that I run) Cheer me on while I dive into the blue (Might be last, but I asked, and I got the very best one) Soon enough, I’ll be right back next to you You can’t leave me with the bill! You can’t collect if I’m breathing still! Chasing down the best of days (I’m turning round the corner) A marathon on broken legs (I’m turning round the corner, I’m turning…around) They can’t see me past my brand new suit (Sign my cast, make it fast, cause I think it’s time that I run) Cheer me on while I dive into the blue (Might be last, but I asked, and I got the very best one) Soon enough, I’ll be right back next to you
5.
My new gray shoes’ve been caked with mud Ever since that night when we Oh, when we laughed and we danced and we pretended that We could be in love That we could be in love That we could be in love My formal suit’s been caked with mud Ever since that night when we Oh, when we laughed and we danced And we spoke of romance Pretendin’ we could be in love We could be in love That we could be in love But we were pretending…pretending… (Pretending!) I could replace the pink that painted your dining room floor Or you could replace the sorrow in me That was knocking at the door But you couldn’t forget the dirty blue iris Of the one who came before And I’d be such a charming person if I didn’t hear those words no more They’re keeping score, sayin’ (You ain’t no) You ain’t no nice guy, Larry (You ain’t no) You ain’t no nice guy, Larry (You ain’t no) You ain’t no nice guy, Larry (You ain’t no) You ain’t no nice guy, Larry I smell a rat And I’m impressed Cause I don’t know how you put it in my wall But if history’s any guide I know That you’re the finest surgeon of them all (I smell a rat) My new gray shoes been caked with mud ever since that night when we When we laughed and we danced And we spoke of romance Pretending we weren’t keeping score Oh, you were keeping score Yeah, you were keepin’ score You were keeping score, saying “(You ain’t no) You ain’t no nice guy, Larry (You ain’t no) You ain’t no nice guy, Larry (You ain’t no) You ain’t no nice guy, Larry (You ain’t no) You ain’t no nice guy, Larry”
6.
Moving Out 05:27
It was a long year Panicked phone calls and Room service for the concierge Dreams of basement relics and the Faces in the shades It was the wrong time The light in your eyes when we met I never could have been prepared Black widow delirium and the Visions of you and me I just wish that I had seen it I just wish that you’d believed it But every day you were disappearing Bit by bit, and so was I I can’t be him Any more Dreaming of the one I adore No I can’t be him anymore Hoping for Open doors That boy you loved Is long gone He’s moving out And you’re moving on You were my best friend You were the one You were my favorite artist You were my only song Sometimes I don’t think I miss you I’ll think I’m better off somehow Sometimes I wish I’d never met you, Maybe I’d disappear by now It makes me wish That I had seen it And how I wish that I’d believed it Cause you said you were disappearing But I guess that I was blind You can’t be her Any more Never found the one you adored You said you can’t be her Any more The shadows creeping under the door The days have drowned With the dawn Just say the word and I’ll be long gone (And there’s nowhere I can go to hide from you) I’m moving out and you’re moving on (Nothing bites at my heels the way you do) Just say the word and I’ll be long gone (Cause there’s nowhere I can go to hide from you) I’m moving out and you’re moving on (Nothing bites at my heels the way you do) Just say the word and I’ll be long gone
7.
The girl in the alley kneels with exhaustion She’s guarded by the skinny guy, who limps from some infection Behind a veil of bleached, thin hair her eyes tell a story Like a photo of Berlin, December 1944 She’s looking for a handout, she’s been high for several weeks now She’s too far gone for whoring and the money just gave out And her heart still beats inside And the blood runs in her veins A remnant of life remains And her heart still beats inside The man finally comes to the door, I’ve seen him several times He’s always looking off And the sunglasses stay on I don’t think it was hope that brought him here To my doorstep Cause it doesn’t seem to bother him When he says “go to Hell” And his heart still beats inside And the blood runs in his veins A remnant of life remains And his heart still beats inside The thought comes to my mind to somehow intervene But it could bring me trouble, and what can I do anyway? It’s hard to be affected when it happens so often You see a life unraveling Through drawn Venetian blinds I’m sickened by compassion I’m stifled by my limitations Anesthetic apathy Come take the pain away And my heart still beats inside And the blood runs in my veins A remnant of life remains And my heart still beats inside Oh God, we need You here We’re sinking fast, and we don’t care The evidence is all around me On both sides of my door Our hearts beat (Our hearts still beat inside) Our hearts beat (Our hearts still beat inside)

credits

released May 15, 2022

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Hesher Cats Seattle, Washington

Hesher Cats is the body through which multi-instrumentalist Robert Clarke formulates his music. He composes, records, and produces all his own material, and when the opportunity presents itself, he plays live with other, like-minded musicians.

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